Life is a journey

Ladies. I just wanted to say that I love and appreciate each one of you. I have been absent and going through my own journey, some of which I will share with you and some is private. I know you’ll understand.

First, it’s amazing how two seemingly simple life changes can make such an impact on one’s life. For those who are married and have a child/children, you will understand. For those who do not, you will when you enter those new roles. I finally found my soulmate after 29 years of existence. Of course, I had dreams of marriage and children by the time I was in college but HaShem did not provide this for me at the time. So I waited and led a single’s life while blissfully romanticizing the future which certainly held that which I had hoped for so long. Suddenly, I got both within 3 months of each other. I was married in June and pregnant by October. Baruch HaShem! And then came the shattering reality of marriage and pregnancy/motherhood. Please understand me, I am happily married and I adore my child! Yet, I was not at all prepared for the truth that these roles are the hardest I’ve ever had to maneuver and often times seem to be in conflict. Also, just the sheer exhaustion I faced while carrying my little one was something I never expected. So this would be the major reason why I struggled with keeping up with this blog in 2014.

“But that’s 2014!” I hear you say, “And we are in 2016 now. Where have you been?” Ah yes, it is March now, isn’t it? My dear readers, I have not forgotten you. I have been so close to sitting down and getting another post out so many times. I have not fulfilled my duty because of my other duties as wife and mother. My little one is now 19 months; having a toddler is no walk in the park! Through her development, I struggled with recovering (I tore very badly during labor and it probably took me 6 months or more to really feel like normal again. I also hemorrhaged significantly.) and also struggled with my housewife duties. Actually, I still struggle with that but while she was too young to move about, she wanted all our attention. It wasn’t until recently that she could sit and play by herself happily where I could actually wash the dishes or vacuum or wash some laundry. I also went through a bout of postpartum depression. As a side note, I encourage each and every one of you to find a way to have help for at least 6 months after you give birth! I had no help but my husband and this was extremely hurtful to my confidence, only encouraging my growing feelings of loneliness. As an extrovert, I moved 5 states away from all my friends and family and still have not settled or found camaraderie here. Make sure you try to understand that if such a situation happens to you and you find yourself pregnant!

Since my daughter has let go more and more, I have been learning to figure out priorities and balance. I felt I was doing well and was situating myself to put more time into this blog only to discover that I am pregnant again! B”H, I am due in May. No, I didn’t just find out about this little one. While this pregnancy has been much easier, it also has been more difficult in other areas such as motivation and energy. I have not struggled with the sheer exhaustion I had with my first. Unfortunately, this pregnancy has made me not want to cover my hair at all. This has been a conflict for me, a big one. How can I post when all I do is throw a beret on my head to go out the door? I don’t even cover regularly at home anymore! This to kindle the fire of my husband’s disinterest in my wearing tichels. He actually prefers me to wear the berets anyway so what do I do but fall into hat-wearing. I had a dear reader ask me about this very thing: (paraphrasing) what do I do when my husband is disinterested in my tichels or even against it? Such a good question. At the time, I had no idea what to say. But I think topics related to headcoverings is a great idea and I want to get that specific question answered. I have decided that I want you all to ask questions for discussion as this blog doesn’t have to be about what I chose to wear on my head but the dilemmas we all face. I still want to post pictures when I begin to use tichels more regularly – which I do see myself doing in the near future.

Another reason that has chipped away at my motivation is something that I need to come clean about, to be bold and admit it. To be real. As I spent time online, I felt more and more like my blog was getting left in the dust. I started this blog before knowing about another major blog out there, that I am sure you all know, and slowly a jealousy crept in as I watched women flock to it and over time other women popped up on youtube or facebook. My ego was attacked and my confidence fell so when I got pregnant and I struggled with working fulltime and fatigue, it was easy for me to tell myself, “Well, what’s the point anyway? No one is really that interested in what you have to offer.” I had had dreams of a side business where I could offer tichel embellishments but it seemed like no one cared. Everyone was purchasing from all these other ladies, and with my fatigue? The thought of running my own business was overwhelming. I let those things fester for far too long. My desire is to offer unique embellishments, and if you can forgive me, I will use this platform from time-to-time to showcase and I will be using facebook also. I have a lot of work cut out for me to be at a point where I will actually sell anything but I also don’t want to chase any of you away. The point of my blog will not be to try to force you to buy anything! I want you to stay here because the creativity and information on headcovering speaks to you. I also want this to be an open market, so-to-speak. If any of you knows a website or company or lady who sells anything related to headcovering, please feel free to share it! I just had a comment on my sinar tichel sewing post noting a pattern for purchase for a snood. This is excellent! But remember, the point of this blog is camaraderie, creativity and information. If selling becomes excessive, I may have to remove the option. B’ez H (G-d willing), it will remain safely under the information side and we all will be happy for the news.

Ok, my dear ones, I am signing off. Next post will be to discuss the issue of husband dislike/disinterest in tichels. And please, comments are so wonderfully welcome!


Passover’ll be coming around the mountain when it comes…

Again, dear readers, I am sorry for the absence. Just know it may happen from time-to-time as I learn how to be a mother and as my lil’ squirrel goes through certain milestones. Like teething. Oy. It certainly has been worse lately, especially this week! But over the last two weeks, I’ve hardly taken pictures of my wraps. Though, I have wrapped, B”H, and not just plunked a hat on my head. It helps that I am in a co-op on FB for scarves and recently found a nice sale at Pat Catan’s, which is a craft store for those who don’t know it. I didn’t until I moved east. Anyway, that’s neither here nor there.

Well, Passover/Pesach is approaching and I have had my mind on it for a while but, as life goes, I have not had the opportunity to really prepare. I believe HaShem (G-d) coordinates the timing of stressful events in order to help one learn to deal with life. And so, here I stand…err, sit, before you really trying to control my stress. This is so important due to my adrenal fatigue and hypothyroidism. I’m choosing mind over matter because I have seen it work in my life before where I chose to have patience with all (ok, most) customers in my retail experience. And B”H, it carried over into other areas of my life. Now, I want to be healed for my sake and, more importantly, for my family’s sake. Since I have become a mom, I have a little one that watches everything that I do which reminds me of my commitment from many years ago to raise my children in a peaceful home. I want Shalom Bayit. (Literally house of peace but more like a “complete” or “whole” house.)

So, one of the ways I am working on Shalom Bayit is to get myself completely ready in the morning. I am still struggling with how early I get up – and, unfortunately, not before sweetpea gets up, but I aim to get ready as if I am leaving as soon as I can. I am proud that I have been able to wrap on a daily basis; however, I have not taken pictures. What I am sharing today is yesterday and today.

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Sadly, my husband didn’t care for either. I have striven to make my wraps (and outfits) beautiful to him which has added some stress because I feel like he disapproves. Want to know his response to this? “Women need to realize that it isn’t clothing that makes them beautiful, but that they make their clothing beautiful.” What a powerful statement that I just had to share.

Ok, my dear readers, I must away to finish for Pesach. Have a happy and kosher Passover for those who keep it. May you all be blessed.

Last Week and a Reader Share

I’ll start first with the Reader Share. I was blessed with a message in my email from a kind soul. A dear reader friend sent me two gorgeous photos of infinity wrap combos I just have to share!

Austrian romance 1 Golden dream 2

The first she named Austrian Romance due to the golden scarf being a traditional Austrian scarf. This is paired with a floral infinity scarf. The second is a golden infinity scarf where she took the end and made a floral “poof” by using a pin! These are just fantastic! I really hope these inspire you to get your hands on some infinity scarves for your collection and play around with them just as she did here! Also, if anyone else wants to share, please feel free to do so:

This past week has had some highlights! I decided to wrap outside of my comfort zone and I got my first sari scarves from Say Your Sari run by Nomi Dayan whom I met on Facebook. These are the best priced sari scarves out there: $12 a piece and if you buy 3, shipping is free! She has other cheaper scarves in case you are on a budget to get the free shipping. I bought 3 and recently got another that I just couldn’t resist. So I wore all three this week and I’m sure I’ll be wearing the 4th as soon as I get it!

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You can see I tried to make a flower with the ends of the scarf. This was my favorite; the color is just phenomenal. And it goes so well with pearls and lace! The only thing to note about sari scarves that disappoint me, is that they are very thin in width and generally don’t cover the whole wrap without creative positioning.

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My second sari scarf is this deep rich navy blue. Just gorgeous. I decided to play around and make it look like I only had my hair half covered. I had watched a tutorial from another wrapper on the Wrapunzel Facebook group on how she makes volume and covers only half, leaving her hair hanging. This must have influenced my thinking when I first put the brown scarf on without a volumizer and subsequently braiding the ends. I like how this turned out. I felt like I was wearing a crown and I am pretty sure I held my shoulders just a bit higher that day. =]

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I wasn’t feeling well and didn’t want to take the effort to wrap as well as get a day of hat wearing in for my husband who prefers it when I wear them. I didn’t want to just wear a hat, so I embellished it! I used one of my new lace headbands and some black ribbon. That was it and it was very comfortable.

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Here I experimented and I am not exactly thrilled with what I came up with. While I love the colors, I don’t think this worked for me. I don’t like how it made a sort of figure 8 shape with my face and after posting it on three groups, a few women gave some tips. One mentioned it was the color scheme and another said I needed more volume. I don’t totally agree with them but then the more I look at the wraps that contain mostly darker, richer colors, the more I think that that’s the color scheme for me. Anyway, I liked the knot – I was thinking of the 1930’s/40’s look, y’know that classic feminist WWII poster?

WWII work incentive poster w. legend We

Clearly not the same but it was still inspiration!

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I went very low key with this sari scarf since, by itself, it creates enough interest! This scarf ended up being much more orange-ish than I expected from the photos online. But I still like it and since I love a nice mustard/gold yellow, I focused on that color. There was a nice strip that had gray in it too, along the top, which was what I used to pick out my outfit. Ha! Does anybody else do this, figure out your outfit based on the tichel you want to wear?

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Here’s another of me wrapping outside of my comfort zone. This is a one scarf wrap, volume and all! It is a thick pashmina which adds just the right amount of volume per my tastes and then the short end, I laid across my head to leave a “v” hanging in the back. I added a nice pearl braid headband and a flower clip I just made, soon to be for sale. I personally avoid heavy weight pashmina styled scarves because they add too much volume for me. So, I am hoping to play around some more to come up with other ways to wrap with just one. I am thinking a tutorial video would be an end result.

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Here I leave you with what I’m wearing today. See, don’t the darker tones just work better for me?

More Fun with Lace – Plus a mini review

Today is day 4 of using my new lace headbands. I just love them. Super easy to use. The only thing I would change due to my own personal preferences is the width because I have a small head and I really only show lace up front. However, the price and the ease of use far outweigh any issue. I never have extra wrinkles or bulk. So without further ado, here’s the last three days of me wearing each of the other colors I bought:

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This was Friday. Dark teal, gray lace, black & white floral, and light teal with silver threading and random sequins. I added a dark blue beaded necklace along the black floral section and topped it off with a silver flower. I started with a tail down, but ended up tucking it in per my husband’s request.

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This was Shabbat’s wrap. I was very pleased with it. I took a chance and mixed the pumpkin lace, which ended up be more like a dark coral, with the more subdued colored floral scarf. The floral scarf has notes of maroon and dusty rose but orange/coral/pumpkin? Not really. However, I love how it turned out! I also have a greenish/tan lace scarf I used as well finalizing it with pearls and a floral pin I made.

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Sunday’s tichel was nice but I had issues. First the description: a base tichel for the volume, but then added my new olive pashmina style scarf with my tan lace headband and my new pre-tied navy and white polka dotted scarf. I tried to have the fringes be embellishment again, as I had done with the infinity scarf ensemble from two weeks ago. I liked this, however, my no slip headband didn’t keep my tichel from not slipping.

I’m brainstorming as to why and how to fix this issue, as this isn’t the only instance lately. My first inclination is that my hair is different postpartum. Also, I’m using different shampoo/conditioner due to the not-so-great water in our apartment. Another thought – I don’t wash my no slip headband often because I only have 1! So, first things first: wash my headband and try again.

Now, on to my mini-review. I have two times now tried out a new “invention” that I picked up on Facebook. I am not sure it has a name…but it looks like this:


But what is it, you are wondering? It is a necklace extender that allows you to extend the length of your necklace to use as embellishment with your tichel! If you go back to Friday and Shabbat in this post, I am using it to hold on my necklaces! This made using necklaces a breeze and I didn’t have to worry about my bobby pins falling out or the necklace falling off. This particular extender is nice in that there are no jump rings to catch on your scarves. This is handmade by Lisa Corley Anthony who, at the moment, has only listed them for sale on Facebook in the buy/sell/trade group. But if you want one – in either gold/brown or silver/black – you can get in touch with her via email, One piece is $9, shipping included within the US.

Coming soon, my new addition – sari scarves! And photos from a reader!


Lace? Yes, please!

I am sure I am going to be talking a lot about Facebook and the groups I am in. I have been enjoying the camaraderie from other women on a daily basis, so I encourage you to join if you are in need of bolstering your wraps. This leads me to my wrap today!

Last night, I got a package (yay!) of new product to try. In the b/s/t (buy/sell/trade) group Tichels, Scarfs and Sheitels Oh My!, a lady (of whom I am working on getting the contact details ***edit see below) was selling all sorts of colors of stretchy lace headbands for $3 a piece. She also added the incentive that if you buy 4, you get one free and shipping was included! Wow, 4 lace headbands for $9?! How can I refuse?!! How can I pick what colors, eh? She is working with a small family business that created these lovely headbands and mentioned that she will work on getting more! More! MORE! LOL, ok I’ve been fairly excitable lately, but I can’t help it. Who doesn’t like to get pretty things to add to their wardrobe? And lace is a staple for my wraps.

Today, I chose to wear the yellow lace and then paired it with darker, more subtle colors. I am really liking this one and I wasn’t sure initially if the colors were going to work; however, it seems that the pop of yellow works really well with the burgundy, plum and floral fabrics. And fabrics they are, since the burgundy and floral pieces are really fat quarters that were precut for quilting and the plum was leftover fabric from a dress I made for a bridesmaid dress. The only real scarf I wore was my “base” that you can’t even see!

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So far, I think this lace headband is great! It is fairly wide for my head, I should have taken a photo before totally wrapping so you could see how it lays by itself. I will try to do that with the other colors I got, which are dark grey, pumpkin and tan. I am thinking that I want a maroon, a white, a black, a navy blue, a….

Ok, ladies! I have more reviews to come soon. I also got a new “invention” that makes wearing necklaces super easy, handmade by another Facebook head-wrapping lady.

Another exciting bit of news, I am putting together a public listing of women whom I’ve met on Facebook who are very skilled at headwrapping. My dream is a club/association/whatever you want to call it of women who are able to meet in person as a tichel tutor! Sometimes, it is hard to figure out where you are going wrong from a video so a helping hand can be just what you require. Or if you just want the camaraderie of other tichel-tying ladies. Or if you are brand-spankin’ new and need the warmth and support of someone in person. So, if this sounds exactly like something you would be interested in – either teaching or being taught – please leave a comment with the area in which you are located and if you could be a tutor, please leave me the information I can publicly post in the contact form below. I apologize, but this is for the USA only at the moment. G-d willing, one day internationally!


***Heather from Heather’s Hearth gave me this link to her Etsy shop. She’s updating the shop with what she had on hand now which will include the lace headbands but also other embellishments. Please message her with any questions. She does take checks if credit cards/Paypal isn’t your thing. I wanted to let you know that her stock is back on its way; however, this sale won’t last long, so hurry and order yours!

To Infinity and Beyond!

I couldn’t resist the urge to use the classic Toy Story phrase so oft quoted from Buzz Lightyear. I felt this works well for my post today as I am super excited to share with you my renewed discovery of infinity scarves and their use for headcovering!

Tasseled Double Braid

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I recently joined yet another Facebook group called We Cover where I was greatly influenced by another member, Anita Franklin-Snyder, who uses infinity scarves on a regular basis. And boy does she have some fun variations! I was so inspired, I grabbed one of my 2 infinity scarves and got to work the very next day. I am so pleased to show you this from yesterday!

This wrap was so easy, comfortable and beautiful, I had to show you guys how to do it. So, without further ado, here’s the tutorial.

On a side note, I am cleaning out my embellishments I have made for my etsy shop and going to make room for new items! I have them for sale on the Facebook group pages of We Cover and Tichels, Scarfs and Sheitels…Oh My! and will soon start to update my Facebook page, Penimah, with those items!


Reminiscent of my former blogging days

Here’s today’s tichel: a splash of summer colors to complement the sunny day! I’m wearing a base tichel covered by my multi-colored scarf with one tail wrapped around the bun. I have a short rectangular brown scarf lain over that with 3/4ths covered, brown tails hidden. I then wrapped the long multi-colored tail around, added a green ribbon headband and topped it off with a silk flower.

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